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(Forum Home)--->(Hunting Stories)--->(The "Honest Abe" Truthtelling Society (and marching band))
Thread Admin: c3shooter (36-0-0) (Last 10 Posts) Posted: 03/09/2010 at 19:51:30
Total Posts: 23
Thread Title: "The "Honest Abe" Truthtelling Society (and marching band)"

Well, I have been GREIVOUSLY wounded by aspersions cast my stories have been exaggerations.   In a spirit of fellowship, kinship, oneupmanship, and perhaps even bullship (yeah, look THAT one up) I invite my fellow residents of the asylum FORUM brethern to post here some of the   events that they have witnessed  in their lifetime. Since the first liar ain't got a chance, I'll start with my Uncle Buck.

He was a country boy from the hills of Virginia.  He came into a bit of money from a land deal- he was offered $500 for 2 acres of land- but city folks were unaware of the geography of the mountains, and how steep it can be.  Buck took the money and left town before they found he had sold them both sides of the same acre of land.  One of them tried to dig a water well, and but it went thru to his neighbor's living room, and folks were injured by cows falling out of  pastures, and landing in cornfields two counties away (corned beef was popular in that area).  He headed West to attempt to increase his capital.  In the oilfields of Texas, he met a pair of wildcatters.  They convinced him to invest his grubstake in their next wells- with no intention of sharing any finds with him.  Two weeks later they took him to three already drilled wells, and told him that they were the wells he had funded, but each was a 7000 ft deep "duster"- no oil at all- and he owned them.  Trying to look at the bright side of things (bright side- usually policeman's spotlight shining into your backseat), without a nickel left to his name, and owning only 21,000 feet of dry oil well, he went out that night, dug them up, and carried them to Kansas.  He cut them into 3 ft lengths, and made a fortune selling them there as pre-dug post holes.  Unfortunately, two holes contained Texas termites, resulting in the deforestation of Kansas that may still be seen.   The story of the preacher's red-headed daughter that invited him into the choir loft to count hymnals shall wait for another day.

OK- your turn.  Please note Navy Chiefs, Marine Gunnys, Army Master Sgts, and used car salesmen may be assigned a handicap of being placed in the "Professional Liar" category, just to level the playing field.  Tongue out



(Start a Thread) (Forum Rules)

Seller: Hagrid(55-0-0) Post#1 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 05:41:58

Years ago, my Grandfather lived in Louisana. One day, he was carrying some chicken wire pass an old Cajuns house. Today, he is the original owner of BayouToms Fried fowl and Brothel in Baton Rouge.     Trapper

Former Seller: BRDouglas(6-0-0) Post#2 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 07:06:56

Trap that wasnt him I read about in the other thread who was catching chickens with chicken wire, ducks with duck tape, and then went by with a pussywillow branch was it?

Seller: Hagrid(55-0-0) Post#3 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 08:42:35

Yepper same guy. Caught enough with the pussy willows to start his own house and resturant. In the south they call him Colonel. His real name was Kenneth Francis Carver. He had to drop the brothel back in the 40's  and regulations on ducks were so strict he couldn't get enough so he stuck with the chickens. He created a secret of herbs and spices during the early days when he was going back and forth upstairs and down. I know the secret but have been sworn to secrecy. I also won't eat his chicken.    Tongue outtrapper

Former Seller: BRDouglas(6-0-0) Post#4 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 08:52:27

Ifn its chicken and smells like fish but tastes like chicken I would be hesitant as well.Surprised

Seller: Hartwell Gun(1186-1-2) Post#5 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 14:00:54
Hartwell Gun

Ya'll have to learn how to spell "Louisiana"before you can make fun of the cajuns.!!LOL!!Don't make me add you to the "yar"list.

Buyer: Splittinhairs(18-0-0) Post#6 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 14:03:46

No we dont! LOL

Seller: Hagrid(55-0-0) Post#7 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 14:08:48

Never been an i person LOL.   Trapper

Former Seller: axolotl(397-0-0) Post#8 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 14:30:34

Noticed a rancher with a 4 foot post in his front yard with a tow chain nailed to the top. Claimed it was a wind guage and you could calculate the wind velocity by the links snapping off the end of the chain. Said it used to a flag pole about 20 foot tall but he nailed a thermometer to it and a blue norther came through and the temperature dropped so fast the mercury drove that pole that far down into the ground. Hey you started this axolotl

Seller: Hartwell Gun(1186-1-2) Post#9 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 15:23:09
Hartwell Gun

There is a restaurant in Pensacola Beach FL called Flounders.They have a weather rock hanging up in a little rope harness near the entrance.The sign reads "Weather Rock"!!If the rock is wet----it's raining.If the rock is swaying-----it's windy.If the rock is hot ---it's sunny.If the rock is cool----it's overcast.If the rock is white---it's snowing.If the rock is blue----it's cold.If the rock is gone----It's a hurricane.Been in there fifty plus times over the years and i still go over to the rock and check the weather.LOL!!

Seller: Hagrid(55-0-0) Post#10 - Posted: 03/10/2010 at 16:05:34

Hart, Thats the biggest damn lie I ever heard.     Trapper

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