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Thread Admin: AA-bob (2-0-0) (Last 10 Posts) Posted: 07/08/2007 at 15:00:18
Total Posts: 6
Thread Title: "Country Funeral (courtesy of the Old Rattler)"
AA-bob Subject: COUNTRY FUNERAL

As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave-side service for a homeless man, with no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost; and did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew, who was eating lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and stepped to the side of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I poured out my heart and soul.

As I preached the workers began to say "Amen," "Praise the Lord," and "Glory!" I preached, and I preached, like I'd never preached before:

.....from Genesis all the way to Revelations.

I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "I ain't never seen anything like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for over twenty years

(Start a Thread) (Forum Rules)

Seller: RobW(108-0-0) Post#1 - Posted: 07/09/2007 at 14:09:46
(no avatar) This is a true story. It is not a crock of $#!t.

Thread Admin: AA-bob(2-0-0) Post#2 - Posted: 07/09/2007 at 18:33:41
AA-bob

RobW, Of course it is! What do you think they buried in the ground.

Seller: RobW(108-0-0) Post#3 - Posted: 07/11/2007 at 12:31:22
(no avatar) Of course it was a crock, but it was still empty!

Former Seller: OLD RATTLER(153-0-0) Post#4 - Posted: 07/11/2007 at 20:51:25
(no avatar) I would not be surprised, if this were not, a TRUE story.L.O.L.

Buyer: Splittinhairs(16-0-0) Post#5 - Posted: 07/12/2007 at 05:53:02
Splittinhairs Was there a vent pipe sticking out the top just in case, and maybe a lid.

Buyer: S.H Panda(0-0-0) Post#6 - Posted: 01/22/2008 at 06:51:15
(no avatar) I hear this one when I was at LeJeune- in NC where "white lightnin'" was a common as Holy Water in the Vatican. Old preacher at the Anticostal First Baptist Church retires, the Deacons send out the call for a replacement, will interview him, have him preach on Sunday and then have a sit-down potluck afterwards on the Church lawn. They get a "newbie" right from Preacher's School, gives a bang-up sermon, leads the Hymn singing, and after the potluck says to the Head Deacon "Say, I'd like to serve the Lord here, what are my chances of gettin' the call?" The Head Deacon says- "Well now son, you gave a real Hellfire 'n Brimstone sermon, did a fine job with 'Amazin' Grace' indeed, but you got yourself in a mite of trouble at the sit-down potluck." "How so, asked the 'newbie", was there something wrong with the Blessing I gave?" "Nope, that was fine, but when my wife ashed if you'd care for more corn, you passed your glass instead of your plate."



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